This is a rant.
I must confess something to you.
I am a guy.
It wasn’t my choice, and overall I’m ok with it.
And I’ve had it up to the ceiling with guys acting like they are the only things in the universe that matter.
- Case 1 – Mom makes due: Ex-husband decides to stop paying child support. Mom struggles to make ends meet due to genetically challenged (disabilities) children. Mom must go to court…and court must threaten incarceration. In the meantime, mom struggles as do the children.
- Case 2 – Real Estate Agent: Real estate agents work odd hours, and lot of weekends. While dating, boyfriend starts vibrating over the hours his female real estate agent paramour works for her business. Both parties have children. (He also neglects to acknowledge the cyclic nature of the real estate business, allowing her some downtime, too.)
- Case 3 – Publisher: Online publisher gets admonished by husband for the work demands of her job and the need to be online at odd hours.
This makes me want to ask questions:
- When did a father get to decide he wasn’t going to support his children (even if it is termed child support?) When did he get to decide he wasn’t helping raise his children?
- When did the guys get to decide what appropriate hours are in a relationship? Yes, children need to be cared for…and most people can find an acceptable schedule.
I’m also in Information Technology and need to work many nights and weekends. My spouse was very accommodating, as was I when she had to do night or weekend duty as a college dean.
To all the guys out there: Back in the Neanderthal days the men would go hunt and the women would stay home and cook. Most of us have evolved. It seems everyone I know (male and female) is working well over 40 hours a week to make ends meet. The mothers of our children need fair and reasonable accommodations for their work/career.
Frankly guys, only a few of us can make enough to support a family on one paycheck. If you are fortunate to have that luxury, you can still support your significant other in her endeavors.
If you are not that fortunate, then please recognize the Neanderthal lifestyle ended with the Neanderthals and step up to the plate. The woman in your life is busting her butt, too. We all must step up to the plate and be reasonable, accommodating and supportive of each other.
It makes me ill when guys mail it in, and become the “high maintenance” ones in the relationship.
Step up to the plate guys…when we all pull on the same rope, we make progress.
End rant.